I know they’re called “resolutions” but honestly, aren’t they actually solutions we’re trying to find to change the things about ourselves that we don’t like?
I wrote about “bullet journals” in the past. At the time I thought of them as useless, time consuming, pointless waste of trees. However, this year, I’d like to give them a second chance. It seems impossible for me to achieve any level of consistency with whatever goals or activities I tell myself I want to do. Wether it is because at heart I don’t really have a deep intention of doing them or because, for most of them, it seems to make no difference if I stop doing them. With reading, for example, I don’t feel any different on the days I’ve read than on those I haven’t. Perhaps the fact I’m able to mark it as a stupid dot on a page I only see will give me some sense of fulfillment. Perhaps having a line of 30 dots neatly aligned is, in fact, rewarding.
I guess the reason why resolutions have never worked for me is because I never take them seriously. I feel there’ll be no difference if I complete them or not. That is, I guess, the real trick. Truly believing that my life would be different if I did accomplish this things. Perhaps this is when all the “visualizing”stuff comes in.
I’ll try then to imagine that I do know enough French to take the DELF certificate.
That I’ve managed to continue drawing in the iPad and I’ve managed to improve my digital drawing skills.
That I’ve been able to visit enough new places to justify living abroad for a year and that I’ve completed enough journal and blog entries to prove that these visits have resulted in self-reflection and personal growth.
That I finally has a piece of paper which proves it took me two years of hard work and a whole lot of money to get a masters degree. (This one is funny because I don’t think it will help me get a better job at no point in the near future).
And finally, that if I workout 20-30 minutes and eat healthy food everyday, I will not look anywhere near Cindy Crawford did in the 90’s, but I will prevent my body from aging any faster than it needs to.